Saturday, October 10, 2015

GTOC Blog #52 The Structure of Love.

Is there a tougher question in this world of global consciousness?

When do you show enough love?

Is there ever enough love to give?

Can you give too much love?


I was asked yesterday to define my structure of love.

There are so many different types of love; love of children, love of self, love of life, love of a lover, love of a stranger, love of a friend, love of world, love of learning, love of distraction, love of god, love of spirit, love of nature...I could go on all day.

Perhaps there are not different types of love, for a person who truly loves feels elation in the giving of it.  Perhaps it is that giving, that expression of love that is the structure?

I express love to my children,
with hugs,
with words,
with empowerment of their voices,
with play,
with food,
with home,
with safety,
with learning,
with time,
with friendship,
and with smiles from my heart when words are not enough.

I express love to myself,
with smiles in the mirror,
with allowing distractions for stress time outs,
with self empowerment of my sense of purpose and being,
with giving love to my children, life, lover, stranger, friend, world, learning, god, spirit, nature...

I express love to life,
with being present,
with being thankful for the easy and the difficult,
with seeing beauty in everything and everyone.

I express love to lover,
with being present,
with being thankful for the easy and the difficult times,
with words,
with touch when words are not enough,
with hugs,
with kisses,
with play,
with time & space,
with distractions in deep conversations,
with the peace of saying nothing when everything is bursting at the seams,
with respect for their individuality,
with respect of truth,
with smiles from my heart when words are not enough.

I express love to stranger,
with a lending hand,
with a lending ear,
with the gift of laughter,
with a hug,
with seeing a beautiful spirit in every face,
with sharing smiles from my heart when words are not enough.
with the acknowlegement that they are not alone.

I express love of a friend,
with the gift of laughter and the gift of tears shared,
with empowerment of their person,
with distractions in deep conversations,
with being non judgemental,
with time & space,
with play,
with hugs,
with respect for their individuality,
with smiles from my heart when words are not enough.

I express love of God and Spirit,
with being thankful for learning through the easy & the difficult,
with being thankful for the heart that is my gift, my talent that allows me to love even when I am not being loved in return and it hurts, because it is the elation of the giving that is my structure of love.

So to answer the first questions, a resounding NO!  The world needs more love.  Love builds your elation of life.  My goal is to make it clear;

I love myself, my life & my god, unconditionally,
If you are my child, you know you are loved by me, unconditionally.
If you are my friend, you know you are loved by me, unconditionally.
If you are my lover & friend you know you are loved by me, unconditionally,
If you are my stranger, you know you are loved by me, unconditionally.

This is my structure of love and I am elated in it.  Vxo



Thursday, October 1, 2015

GTOC Blog #66 Recycling Humans... Vxo



I have never been good in the dating arena.  In fact this is a known fact within me.  For years I simply preferred not to date seriously.  I think I am a little old fashioned in the level of value I place upon people and their experiences together. 
When my daughter was in high school, I sat in the church parking lot with my younger daughter, awaiting the after dance pick up time.  I witnessed one young 'lady' enter a parked vehicle with another young 'gentleman'.  As the windows steamed up, I thought to myself "awwwww they are making out!'...then he left alone and another young "gentleman" entered.  In disgust I witnessed one boy after another enter the vehicle and leave.  My daughter tells me this is a high school thing.  I purposely forgot the exact street terminology, I call it recycling.  

I said nothing to the girl or her prominent parents in our small society, but the words that never crossed my lips were, "how inspiring it was that she was so environmentally consious and that perhaps this was a "green career" she should continue within."

I am by far not a prude.  I do however know value and I know devalue.  I have been personally both.  Mostly devalue.  The world of today understands devalue, so that when I push for value, they don't comprehend.  We jump into a relationship so fast that we devalue not only ourselves, we recycle the other person.  I said "we", not "I" not "you",..."WE".

I watch both men and women of today, openly switch up partners, just for the night or perhaps for the season.  No harm no fowl.  Relationships end and begin quicker than the seasons.  They "heal" so fast that the heart wonders if it ever beat for the other person?

Since moving to the city two weeks ago from a small town, I have smiled like a little girl coming home.  How I look and dress is not unusual.  In fact here I am just simply normal.  However, my grin from ear to ear at accomplishing not one but two dreams radiates my every movement.  Last week, I stopped driving and jumped on the TTC adventure!  Every day, at least one gentleman has approached me and told me how beautiful my smile was.  Today a retired soccor star from Switzerland proposed to me!  Of course I politely smiled as I helped the elderly Iranian woman on to the bus.  

This should be boosting my ego.  It doesn't.  For I am a recycled human and I have recyled other humans.  I feel shamed.  It doesn't matter that it was accomplished within the depths of my heart.  What matters is that it was accomplished.  This isn't the world where my heart lives, so I thought I'd take a break from it for another bunch of years, maybe forever.  The value of recycling humans has no relation to our environmental endeavors.  Simply put it is a sign of our devalued times.  Politically I could accomplish this same argument across the globe, with newcomers, refugees, women, children, men, animals....we know those, they are in the news.

As I assisted the elderly Iranian woman and her walker on to the bus to her destination, I smiled and waved.  She spoke no english except for the trained sentence of "thank you sister".  Here she is, tiny and lovely traveling in faith across a world not of her own understanding.  She knows value.

As I walk away leaving her in the good hands of the bus driver, I wave with a reassuring smile before I duck my head and pull into my world.  Today, I feel recycled.  Tomorrow I will once again pull my head high and walk like Laura Croft through the castle that is my city of home.  Yet I have once again learned my value and this recycled human concept of dating is not mine own.  Being alone, works better for me, because I never was very good at recycling.  Vxo